Its 2023, sadly, nothing has changed in my life. Everything is in status quo, even though I tried my best to change, nothing has. My fault maybe.. Yes, I can put the blame on people but in the end, everything was my choice and in the end, I’m to blame. I let people trample me and belittle me and refuse to hear a word I say. I want to get out of that trap. How? I don’t know. God knows I want to improve myself, God knows I want so much more. But I seem to be at a loss on how to get it.
Napapagod na ako. Gusto ko nang sumuko. Parang walang tamang nangyayari. Ayoko ng isipin na ganito, pero paano nga ba maging positibo sa harap ng hirap, balakid, pasakit, sama ng loob na araw araw na lang nararamdaman. Hindi madali at madalas pa nga, natatalo ako. Madalas, nanalo ang sama ng loob, ang sakit, anong gagawin ko? Sa nararamdaman ko? Ang hirap balewalain, ang hirap piliting wag maramdaman, kasi andyan… I’m trying, so hard. I’m not sure how to move forward with this, I’m not sure how to move forward with trying to stay positive kasi parang puro negativity.
May mga araw talagang ganito… May mga araw na parang pagod ka na… Pero in the end, no choice naman kundi lumaban.. Let it be for now. Today is already spent… tomorrow is another day, let’s all pray it will be better.
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