Stumped and Confused...

I am thinking that my title is bit overdramatic, but yea, can't think of better words to describe what I'm feeling.

Anyways, I have been wanting to write a story for a very long time now, my thoughts are all over as to the plot and the characters and I am really getting pissed at myself a bit, because it should be so easy. Well, it was before... can I blame old age? stress? fatigue? maybe even burnout? Whatever it is, it really is stunting and stopping whatever writing I want. When I try to sleep, thoughts will form in my head, possible stories and such but when I get up and try to put it into words, all I can see is a blank space, without any coherent thought forming in my head.

I want to go to a seminar and learn, but more often than not, with these things, I end up disappointed because what they teach, I already know.

I'm stumped, because I don't know where to go from here, where I need be, what I need to do to begin my quest in writing again.

I'm confused because I know thoughts are in my head, swirling stories around but I can't seem to find the write words to fit the melody inside my head.

I tried writing in my native language but still to no avail.

I want to inspire and motivate, I want to create a wonderful story where anyone who manages to take a glimpse would want more. I crave for a story, all my own that people will want to read and read again.

I want to give myself sometime to rest and relax but life beckons, responsibilities await and I know that my time will come for sure, but when? that is the big question. Well, perhaps one day, these won't be lamentations anymore, but joyful rejoicing because I was finally able to pen what's inside my head.

Until then I remain, sadly, stumped and confused...